I. My wanting to have a child is only for a shallow reason that babies are cute. All the stories about my maternal instincts coming into play were induced by my opinion that babies are cute to look at. That’s just it. I want to have children of my own but later in my life na lang.
Gauging my tolerance for toddlers and little kids now, I am not fit to be a Mom yet. I just have no patience for them. Little ones, I can probably manage (to an extent) because they cannot talk and defy me, unless of course they bawl and wail like crazy that I have to give them back to their yayas or parents before they turn blue from crying. Kids in their terrible twos and above are just driving me crazy. They are all over me. Can’t they sense I’m a Grinch in disguise??? They just wouldn’t go even if you politely tell them to get the hell out of your sight. They have endless whys and whats. Wherever I go, they tag along. They tinker with my things. I know they are just curious just the way I had been before but…argh. I know it’s too rude and too selfish but I never shouted at them or rudely asked them to go away, to be fair to me. Maybe that’s why they can’t grasp why I need to be alone. I usually ask my Mom discreetly to lure them away from me…and she knows all the ways as to how because she really knows I hate being surrounded by rowdy little people. They can be adorable at times but I guess I’m just not fit to be with kids at this time. Actually, as you already know, I prefer to be alone in my own little world than be a social animal. You know what I mean.
II. I am not one who literally count the gifts I receive. I am really very appreciative that a huge gift and a short note in a Post-it mean the same to me. However, I have to take exception with one thing I got, actually not a gift but a “raffle” prize, which I consider the best I got this year. It was from the office where, as State Department regulation dictates, gifts from “customers” should only be tolerated to an extent. Everything the office received have been accounted for and would be “raffled off” to or shared with everyone, including a batch of rosaries from the office of the Philippine Ambassador to the Vatican. I was one of the 30 lucky ones who got a rosary, which was from Rome and blessed by Pope Benedict XVI himself. If I’m not mistaken, the office was a bit hesitant to accept the gifts but the element of religion and diplomatic relationship prevailed so we got the 30 rosaries. There was a joke that more than a blessed rosary, we need actual prayers straight from the Vatican to guide us with our everyday work dilemma 🙂 However, seriously, a rosary is more than enough to get me, us, through. I know there is nothing much to worry about but it doesn’t mean that I don’t have to pray for guidance with regard to the things I want to do or achieve. 🙂
p.s. I am soooo happy. I have not felt kilig in a while, I mean not this much since the “heyday” of my feelings for one guy (everything is so cool with us naman na eh, I guess I don’t have to say that repeatedly na…including the fact that his Christmas text message was the most heartwarming and most madrama I got!). Thanks to Rach, a little more prodding and I’ll drop Hongkong for Taiwan naaa!!!!! Grabe, super 🙂 Feeling giddy and sporting a wide smile now 🙂
Categories: Citizen Judie