I amaze myself with my daytime strength these days. Usually, I would be tired after office hours and even if I still reach the wee hours watching TV or going online, it’s usually just my mind awake; my body would be just a mere compartment to store my bones and muscles in. Also, these were the times when I always fall asleep after eating my lunch, or sometimes I’d be like a switch that turns off around 2 pm.
Lately, I feel like an energizer bunny that even if I wake up at 6 am, I manage to enjoy my quick breakfast and my quick bath and still arrive at the office on time. I would be alert the whole day, with no bouts of sleepiness at all, and when I get home, my mind and body are synched in doing whatever needs to be done (well, no big tasks there, actually just watching TV or going online – yeah, laziness and uselessness at its finest, I know).
Maybe it’s because a whole ton of stress has been lifted from my chest. Or an emerging love for my leafy greens. Perhaps the change in my after-office lifestyle. It could be because of all of them. I don’t know so I’m not surprised that you don’t either.
If it’s just crazy female hormones, then I wish they’d stay longer. I still feel strange but I damn love this development.
On the side, I just have to tolerate my tear ducts. Like, it shouldn’t feel strange anymore that hearing David Archuleta or Michael Johns sing would make me tear. Or a succession of Brothers & Sisters episodes would leave me crying, as in with legitimate tears and mild pain in the chest. In some part of the world, people could have cried over the very same things, especially with Brothers & Sisters, so it shouldn’t be surprising.
My weirdness aside, crying really is very therapeutic. However, enduring feelings from what I watched influence my mindset toward real-life experiences. For example, that feeling of joy after finding out that you’re pregnant (like Kitty and Robert, and even Justin), putting yourself in your mother’s meddling, opinionated shoes and realizing that it’s what all mothers do (like Nora’s ‘mother’ litany to Sarah and Kitty, that if they have problems then she has problems), dealing with divorce and a painful custody decision that’s not in your favor (like Sarah and that very strong demeanor in front of her now-estranged [who’s also proud, lame, and let me say, not working aka palamunin grrr!] husband and very adorable kids, that after closing the door, her knees gave up because her heart has been terribly broken).
It was the Brothers & Sisters fangirl in me who typed that, I’m surprised you’re still reading until now!
Let me get my senses in check because it’s time for… Spongebob Squarepants. April is starting to feel very very good.