Practically everyone who has access to social media platforms already expressed their fears, disappointments, paranoia. We crossed the first year mark of dealing with COVID and despite vaccines being made available, we here in the Philippines are still struggling to claw our way out of this.
The casualties and deaths have begun creeping closer and closer to home.
This is a very personal thought that may come across as ungrateful, whiny, and ‘how dare you feel that way’; but this is as valid as any other fears and apprehensions. The last few months saw people I work with, people I know, who went through the harrowing journey of battling COVID. Today I found out someone we literally worked with, in person and most recently in a series of office-level frustrations over mailbox storage that we all just laughed at eventually, died from it after less than a week of feeling sick. The daily figures are not statistics to me now, and while I felt for the increasing numbers since the past year, it’s only now that the numbers have names and faces to me.
It feels like we are fighting an enemy with blindfolds on. Majority of us complied, complied, and complied, yet government action is not getting it done — so it’s an inaction, actually. The daily dose of uplifting messages are momentarily helpful but when fear sets in, the rest of the negative feelings, mostly that of hopelessness, follows. And at this rate, all these feelings must be considered valid. This is on top all other sources of hopelessness that have nothing to do with COVID, the ones that have existed – and rolled – in the midst of the pandemic.
It was said that life is hard, no one contests that, and the truth of this has not been felt more in recent decades than at present. I am really scared.